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Sigh…. Got my second assignment for microeconomics. I failed it. And the marks from the previous assignment is not enough to even it out…

Right after, I went up the fifth floor and looked down the edge. It was really high. Would’ve definitely died on the spot if i fell head first. I gazed into the unknown in my mind, and the next thing i knew, I blacked out on the stairs. Darkness overcame me, and I journeyed into the very centre of my soul and conscience.

There was a light in the distance. Didn’t see anyone within the light but i heard a voice. He said “If you jump, I won’t take your spirit. You will not be welcomed into my house.”
I said “Lord, why not? Didn’t I live a life that glorified your name? It was a weird one, i know, but didn’t it all end up exalting your name?”
He said “And you can do more. This is just one part of your life. The tip of the iceberg. Live, and I will do great wonders in you.”
“Lord is this the path You want me to take?”
“Do you want to take this path?”
“No, but then again there’s always this pull in my heart to keep trying.”
“If it’s not your will than whose is it? From this path you will possess skills that I can use for your desire and my will.”

The light lessened and I open my eyes. I got up and cried. God, why do you want me to go through this? I hate the corporate world and all it’s lies. I just want to be where You are, in your presence, where I am strong and can do anything you ask me to. Then there was that same voice “In your weakness, I will prevail, and they shall all know that it is not by your own strength, but Mine. You will be My living testimony. So live, and I will be with you always.”

Suddenly I felt so calm, at peace. Knowing that if not now, it’ll be later that God will prevail in my life. Why should I jump just because of one failure, when previously i have done many? I just need to be patient and do my best. I looked back down the edge and thought “God will take me when it’s time. Who am I to play God?”

Sigh…. pray for me… all those who love me, please pray for me…. It’s hard, it’s tough. I just want to quit because it involves the one muscle i don’t use so much… my brain. It’s not in-line with my heart.

Think this is a story? Think again. God’s as real as that.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, May 22nd, 2007 at 5:20 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.